The reason I write

I think the reason I write is because it takes me out of the real world. I stop feeling lonely, sad, depressed. When I watch Supernatural, it distracts me for a while, but after an episode it makes me think about my life. Sometimes I just want to pack up and leave without telling anyone. Just take Coco, Jade, and April with me and leave. I'd turn off my phone, not even go on Facebook... I want to see who would actually worry about me, who would actually care. I mean, I feel lonely all the time. I feel like nobody truly understands me. People try to get into my head, but they don't actually understand like they claim they do. Sometimes I cry so much, but I really have nothing to complain about. I have gotten everything I have ever wanted. I wanted a puppy? Done. I wanted a pony? Got it. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a spoiled little bitch. I mean, my dad doesn't give me EVERYTHING... but I still feel like I have a pretty great life... But if my life is so great, why do I feel so lonely? My parents are divorced, my mom lives in Nevada and I've lived with my dad since I was 7. He has always been there for me. My first heartbreak he held me in his lap until I stopped crying. Every time I had a bad dream, I knew my dad was there for me. I see my mom more times than most kids with divorced parents do. I feel as though movies have made my expectations of life way too high. But not just me, other people too. In a movie, you expect that the first person you meet or maybe even the second, is your significant other. but in all reality, you will go through many heartbreaks before you find the one you will spend the rest of your life with. Maybe that's why I'm always so depressed; because I expect my life to turn out like a movie. I don't know, but I know that writing helps me. I love being transported into another story, somebody's story that isn't mine. Thanks for taking your time in reading this. xD

Just posting about my night/morning

So last night, I was reading stories online until about 1am. After I began to feel sleepy, I turned off the laptop and decided to go to sleep. Just as I had fallen asleep, I woke up to "LACY" being screamed into my window. I quickly sat up in my bed, realizing it was my brother who had called my name. "WHAT?" I yelled at him. "Will you drive us to The Golden Acorn?" He asked in such a sweet way, it reminded me of Sam Winchester when he lost his shoe. I of course rolled my eyes and said sure and pulled a shirt over my head. When I had gotten outside, I was told to drive my cousin's car. It is a little Pontiac... Well, not little, it weighs more than our Ford F250 truck. And it's a fast fucking car. I had never even been in the car before and it was dark, so I was shaking for most of the time I had driven. I was only going about 50 MPH on the curvy 94 as I entered Campo (Only 9 miles from where I live) When we finally had gotten to the Casino, it was 1:54. I parked at a pump at the Quick Mart Gas station at the Golden Acorn and my bro and his friend went inside to get beer. I sat back in the seat only to see a fucking sheriff. Since I am still under 18, I cannot drive between the hours of 11pm-5am. My heart literally stopped beating as the sheriff drove around behind me. after almost 15 minutes, my bro's friend comes out with the beer. After what seemed like forever, my bro comes out with a Rockstar for me and cigarettes for him. We went straight home afterward. Got home around 3 something and I started to go back into my room when my dad and cousin stopped me. "What did you think of the car?" I was asked. "It's fucking fast and heavy. Kind of intimidating, but very awesome." After that, i was able to go to bed. I slept until about noon, which I never do. So yeah, that was an interesting experience I felt like sharing xP